Sunday, July 4, 2010

How NOT to be HOT


Sometimes our mistakes can lead to very cool discoveries. Just last week, while on the air, I nearly said a fairly objectionable word. During the song break, while talking about it with Steve and Jong Hyun, we happened upon an interesting topic for a show. (I won’t tell you how we got there, but...) While we were joking about, out of our jokes emerged the idea of a show about ways people can NOT be a hot commodity. Since we’re always talking about the serious business of searching for a job, we thought that maybe this week we could break things up a bit and look at the funny side of job preparation.

You know, the truth is, in this world of ours, there are many people out there who really do NOT want to be a hot commodity. They do some really silly things when they are looking for work, interviewing, networking, volunteering, etc. I decided to collect some interesting and silly stories for our listeners. You never know....there may be some people out there who, in fact, do NOT want to be a hot commodity. So, if that’s you....here are some stories of ways you can become unhot.

Let’s start with Networking....

There’s the story of the young man who decided to attend a job fair. While interacting with a group of people, he decided to make a comment about how hot and sexy he thought the woman behind the HP booth was. You can imagine his surprise when one of the people in the group turned out to be the woman’s husband. ...you can further imagine the man’s surprise when a month later the young man walked into an interview with financial company only to find the woman’s husband as the interviewer. How not to be a hot commodity? Blab!!!! Talk! Keep not your more personal love opinions to yourself during networking opportunities with new people.

There’s also the story of the young woman who, while also at a job fair, decided her cell phone text messaging to be more important than the person she was talking to. An older woman walked up to her said hello, and moments later the young girl excused herself to write a text message. After the old lady walked away, it was pointed out to the young girl that the older lady was the boss of a well known company. How not to be a hot commodity? SMS instead of network.

How about job prep?

We all know that volunteering is really important to assist us in getting that awesome experience we need to get the job. Well, there are certain do’s and don’ts we should consider when volunteering.

There’s the story of the young man who volunteered with a service that provides elderly people with transportation on weekends. After picking up an elderly man, the young guy asked him if he minded that they stopped by his best friends house for just a second. The young many said he needed to drop something off. The elderly gentleman said he didn’t mind. So, the young man went inside. About an hour later, after knocking on the door of the house, the elderly man walked in. Inside, he saw the young man and his friends drinking beer, smoking funny substances and playing XBox. How not to be a hot commodity....fail to do your volunteer work.

There are also the stories of the people who allow their friends to take them on a drinking binge the night before an interview. D’oh! Don’t do that.

There are also the stories of the stories of the MBA graduate who misspelled Masters on her resume. And, the story of the Phd student who misspelled Doctorate. (It’s Doctorate, not Doctrate).

When it comes to interviews, there are many many MANY ways Not to be a hot commodity.

There’s the story of the young man who brought a water bottle into an interview. During the interview, he asked if he could take a drink. The interviewer of course said okay. So, the young man took a drink, swished the water around in his mouth and spit it into a plant pot next to him. ....don’t do this. It’s bad for the plant. ^^

There’s the story of the woman who brought her pet dog with her into the interview. COME ON!!!! Apparently she didn’t get the job. Had the dogs ears been light blue instead of the dark blue....it might have made all the difference.

There’s the story of the job applicant who told the interview that she was more of a “people person” than a “numbers person”. ...this would have been okay, had the job she was applying for NOT been as an accountant.

There’s the story of the young man who answered his cell phone during the interview. Um.....this might not be a good idea.

There is the story of the young man who said he was so eager to join the company that he got a tatoo of the company put on his chest. ...he didn’t get the job. You might want to get the job first. ....eagerness is good, but....

There’s the story of the applicant who fell asleep during the panel interview. She was in with four other applicants. While the otheres were talking, she herself decided to take a little nap.

There’s the story of the young man that walked into the interview room, big smile, confident posture, hot looking suit. As he reached out to shake the interviewers hand, he started to speak. As he did, the candy he had in his mouth fell out and landed on the interviewers hand. So flustered, the interviewee lost all confidence. Moral of the story, chew gum not candy. Just kidding! No candy!

Of course, once we get the job...there are some things that we will will absolutely want to do if we do NOT want to be a hot commodity.

We can write bad things about the company and boss on FACEBOOK. This is really wise. Especially if the boss is one of your “friends”.

There’s the story of the young girl who kept having her friends call her at work. When confronted about it, the young girl yelled at her boss. It’s might right to have friends, she screamed. ....yes...it’s your right. It’s also your right to FIND ANOTHER JOB you dumb fool!

Of course, backstabbing people at work is a great way to make friends and influence people. Yes, this is always smart.

There’s also the story of the young person who worked for a manufacturing company. Over the course of two years, he took home more than 1 million screws. Apparently he sold them online for over 155,000won. Good job. D’oh!

There’s the Detroit woman who decided to sue her collegue for repeatly wearing too much perfume. If only she’d worn Chanel.

Finally, there’s the story of the coca-cola and pepsi salesperson who decided to have a fist fight in the middle of a Wal-mart. The pepsi sales person was sick of being number two. Apparently, in this instance, Pepsi was better than Coke.

So there you have it. If you are intersted in NOT becoming a hot commodity, feel free to follow any one of the things I’ve mentioned. If, however, you’d like to continue on your pathway to becoming HOT in the marketplace....well....I don’t really think I need to tell you what to do here.

Have a good week everyone!

Michael Jay....OUT!

1 comment:

  1. If nothing else, you’ll feel great for having given your guts to make another person feel good. …best dissertation and sometimes that’s reward enough.

    ReplyDelete

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